1.The Joke
Sir William Thompson was very deaf but he did not like people to know this． One evening he had invited several friendsto dinner， and while they were sitting at the table， one of thefriends told a funny story． Everyone laughed， and SirWilliam， who had laughed as loud as anyone， said，“That was a very funny joke， but I know a funnier one． Would you liketo hear it？” They all said they would， so Sir William began hisstory． When it ended， everyone laughed louder than ever andSir William smiled happily． But he didn‘t know the reason for their laughter． He had told the very same story that his friendhad just told．
翻译：
笑话
威廉·汤普森爵士非常聋，但他却不愿意让别人知道这 件事，一天晚上，他邀请了几位朋友吃饭。在就餐的时候，一 位朋友讲了个有趣的故事，大都笑了，汤普森也和别人一 样放声大笑，他说：“这是个十分有趣的笑话，但是我还知道 一个更有趣的笑话，你们愿意听吗？”朋友们都说愿意听。于 是，汤普森开始讲他的故事。当故事讲完时，大家笑得比方才 还厉害，汤普森的脸上露出了欣慰的笑容。但他却不知道别 人发笑的原因。原来，他讲的正是方才那位朋友讲的故事。
2.what is a traitor in politics？
Young hopeful：“Father，what is a traitor in politics？” Father（a veteran politician）：“A traitor is a man who leaves our party and goes over to the other one．” Young hopeful：“Well then，what is a man who leaves his party and comes over to yours？” Father：“A convert，my son．”
翻译：
什么叫政治叛徒
有希望的青年人：“父亲，什么叫政治叛徒？” 父亲（一位老资格的政治家）：“叛徒指的是离开我们党而加入到另一个党的人。” 有希望的青年人：“那么，离开他的党而加入到我们党的人又叫什么呢？” 父亲：“叫改变信仰者。我的儿子。”
3.An Absent Minded Professor
A notoriously absentminded professor was one day observed walking along the street with one foot continually in the gutter，the other on the pavement． A pupil meeting him said： “Good evening，professor．How are you？ “Well，” answered the professor，“I thought I was all right when I left home，but now I don‘t know what‘s the matter with me．I‘ve been limping for the last half hour．”
翻译：
心不在焉的老师
有一天，人们看见一个有名的心不在焉的老师在路上走，他的一只脚一直踏在街沟里，另一只脚踩在人行道上。 一个碰见他的学生说： “晚安，老师。您怎么了？” “啊，”这位老师回答说：“我想我离开家的时候还挺好的，可是现在我不知道出了什么毛病。我已经一瘸一拐走了半个小时了。”
4.The Young Man at the Wheel
My infant daughter began crying as I drove home from the store, and since she was harnessed to her safety seat in the back, I couldn‘t console her. Stopping for a red light, I turned around and waved my hands, calling her name to distract her. I gave her my biggest smile and blew her a kiss. The sound of a horn from the car behind us prompted me to look up. The young man at the wheel was smiling broadly .He waved and then blew me a kiss.
翻译：
驾车的小伙子
从商场开车回家的路上，我的小宝贝女儿开始哭闹起来。由于她被套在后面的安全座里，所以我无法安慰她。红灯停车的时候，我转过身来，对她摆手，叫她的名字来引她。我给她以满脸笑容，并给她一个飞吻。从我们车后传来的喇叭声立刻使我抬头望去。驾车的小伙子正对我咧着大嘴笑。他向我摆手并给了我一个飞吻。
