1.The doctor lives downstairs
“Doctor,” she said loudly, bouncing into the room, “I want you to say frankly what‘s wrong with me.”
He surveyed her from head to foot. “Madam,” he said at length, “I‘ve just three things to tell you. First, your weight wants reducing by nearly fifty pounds. Second, your beauty could be improved if you used about one tenth as much rouge and lipstick. And third, I‘m an artist—the doctor lives downstairs.”
翻译:
医生住在楼下
“我想让你坦率地说我到底得了什么病。”
他从头到脚打量打量她,然后大声说:“太太,我有三件事要对你说。第一,您的体重需要减少大约50磅;第二,如果您要用上十分之一的胭脂和口红,您的美貌将会改变。第三,我是一位画家——医生住在楼下。”
2.Things happened thirty years ago
Uncle Silas had lighted his pipe for a comfortable smoke,when Aunt Rebecca looked up from her knitting and said:“Silas,do you know that Sunday next will be the thirtieth anniversary of our wedding?” “I swan,”said Silas,“is that so,and what about it?” “Oh,nothing,”said Aunt Rebecca,“only thought may be we ought to kill them two Rhode Island Red chickens.” “But,Rebecca,”said Uncle Silas,“how can you blame them two Rhode Island Red chickens for what happened thirty years ago?”
翻译:
三十年前发生的事
赛拉斯大叔点燃了烟斗想好好吸一口,丽贝卡大妈织着毛衣抬眼说:“赛拉斯,你知不知道下星期日是我们结婚三十周年?” “老天哪,”赛拉斯说,“是吗?那又怎么样?” “噢,没什么,”丽贝卡大妈应道,“我只是想,也许我们该把那两只罗得岛红鸡宰了。” “可是,丽贝卡,”赛拉斯大叔说,“你怎么能够把三十年前发生的事怪到那两只罗得岛红鸡的头上呢?”
3.An Exceptional Phenomenon
4-year-old Begin and his cousin scrambled (攀爬,争抢) for toys. His mum told him: “ You are older brother because you’re older than your (cousin) sister. You should give ground to her. ” Begin thought a little but maintained(坚持) : “ My sister must give ground to me when she grows older than I.” His uncle around overheard and said : “Such a thing hardly occurs.”
翻译:
罕见
四岁的贝京和小妹妹争玩具。妈妈对他说:“你大,你是哥哥,要让着小妹妹点儿。” 贝京想了想,坚持说:“等妹妹长得比我大了,她也得让着我。”姨夫在一旁听了说:“这种情况相当罕见。
4. Three Turtles
Three turtles decided to have a cup of coffee. Just as they got into the cafe, it started to rain.
The biggest turtle said to the smallest one, ” Go home and get the umbrella.”
The little turtle replied, “I will, if you don‘t drink my offee.”
“We won‘t,” the other two promised.
Two years later the big turtle said to the middle turtle, “Well, I guess he isn‘t coming back, so we might as well drink his coffee.”
Just then a voice called from outside the door, “If you do, I won‘t go.”
翻译:
三只乌龟
三只乌龟决定去喝咖啡。它们刚到咖啡店的门口,就下起雨来。于是最大的那只乌龟对最小的乌龟说,“回家去取伞吧。”
最小的乌龟说,“如果你们不把我的咖啡喝了,我就去。”
“我们不喝,”另外两只乌龟答应说。
两年后,大乌龟对中乌龟说,“好吧,我猜他肯定不回来了,我们可以把它的咖啡喝掉了。”
正在这时,一个声音从门外传来,“你们要是喝了,我就不去。”