Whose dog is the most intelligent
Four friends were arguing over whose dog was the smartest. The first man, an engineer, called to his dog, “T Square, show your stuff. ” The dog trotted over to a desk, pulled out a paper and pencil, and drew a perfect triangle.
The next guy, an accountant, called to his dog, “Slide Rule, go ahead. ” The dog went to the kitchen, nibbled opened a bag of cookies and pided the contents into four equal piles.
The next man, a chemist, beckoned his dog, Beaker, to show what he could do. The dog went to the fridge, took out a quart of milk and poured out exactly eighty ounces into a measuring cup.
The last man was a government worker. “Coffee Break,” he hollered to his dog, “go to it. ” With that, the dog jumped to his feet, soiled the paper, ate the cookies and drank the milk.
翻译:谁的狗最聪明
四个朋友在为谁的狗最聪明而争吵。第一个人是个工程师，他对自己的狗喊道：“T形角，使出你的本领来。”这只狗便跑向一个书桌，拉出一张纸和一支铅笔，画出了一个完美的三角形。
第二个人是个会计。他对他的狗说：“Slide Rule，上吧。”那狗直奔厨房，用嘴咬开一袋甜饼并把饼分成了四等份。
第三个人是位药剂师。他命令他的狗Beaker表现一下。但见那狗径直走向冰箱，叼出一瓶牛奶并精确地把八盎司牛奶倒入一个量杯中。
最后一位是政府职员。“休息时间，”他对自己的狗喊叫，“去吧。”话还未落，那狗便跳起来，踏污了那张纸，吃掉了所有的甜饼，喝光了那杯牛奶。
2. I hung him up to dry
Jim and Mary were both patients in a Mental Hospital. One day while they were walking by the hospital swimming pool, Jim suddenly jumped into the deep end. He sank to the bottom. Mary promptly jumped in to save him. She swam to the bottom and pulled Jim out.
When the medical director became aware of Mary‘s heroic act he immediately reviewed her file and called her into his office.
“Mary, I have good news and bad news. The good news is you‘re being discharged because since you were able to jump in and save the life of another patient, I think you‘ve regained your senses. The bad news is Jim, the patient you saved, hung himself with his bathrobe belt in the bathroom，he‘s dead.”
Mary replied, “He didn‘t hang himself, I hung him up to dry.”
翻译:是我把他晾干了
Jim和Mary都是精神病院里的病人。一天，他们沿着医院的游泳池散步，Jim突然跳入泳池的深水区，他沉到了底部。Mary立刻跳下去救他，她潜到水底，把Jim拉了上来。
当院长听闻了Mary的英勇行为后，他立刻翻看了她的病历档案,把她叫进了自己的办公室.
“Mary，我有一个好消息和一个坏消息要告诉你。好消息是你能跳入水中救其他病人，这说明你的意识已经恢复了，你可以出院了。坏消息就是，Jim，你救的那个病人，他还是用自己的浴袍带子在浴室上吊自杀了。”
Mary说：“他没有自杀，是我把他吊起来好让他晾干。”
