Give a wrong hospitality
At a dinner party a shy young man had been trying to think of something nice to say to his hostess. At last he saw his chance when she turned to him and remarked, “What a small appetite you have tonight, Mr. Jones.””To sit next to you,” he replied gallantly, “would cause any man to lose his appetite.”
翻译:
献错殷勤
在一次晚餐聚会上，一位腼腆的年青人一直在冥思苦想对女主人说一些好听的话。机会总于来了，女主人转向他说：“琼斯先生，您今晚的饭量太小了。”“坐在您身边，”他殷勤的说道，“任何男人都会失去胃口的。”
CD player
While shopping for my first CD player, I was able to decipher most of the technicalese on the promotional signs. One designation had me puzzled, though, so I called over a salesperson and asked, What does ‘hybrid pulse D/A converter‘ mean?That means, she said, that this machine will read the digital information that is encoded on CDs and convert it into an audio signal – that is, into music.In other words this CD player plays CDs.Exactly.
翻译:
CD唱机
在购买我的第一部CD唱机时，我能够解读推销标记上面的大多数技术语言。但是有一个标示却让我颇为迷惑，于是我叫过销售商，问道：‘混合脉冲D/A变换器’是什么意思？它的意思是，她说，这个机器能够读CD碟上加码的数字信息，将它转换成声音信息－也就是说，转换成音乐。换句话说，这个CD唱机能够播放CD碟。正是如此。
they‘re all drowned
The great painter was asked, one day to paint a picture of Pharaoh crossing the Red Sea. A little while after the picture had been commenced, a hitch（故障） arose over the fee, and Hogarth found that he would have to complete the commission for about half the sum he expected. When the work was completed, the patron（赞助人，主顾） was asked to come and inspect it. As a matter of fact, the picture was just one daub（涂抹，涂料） of brilliant red.What‘s this? exclaimed the purchaser. I asked for the Red Sea, on the occasion of the celebrated passage.That‘s it, replied Hogarth.But, where are the Israelites?They are all gone over.Where are the Egyptians?They‘re all drowned.
翻译:
他们全都淹死了
一天，有人请这位伟大的画家画一幅法老王渡红海图。这幅画刚开始不久，酬金就出现了问题。霍迪斯发现，完成这幅画后，他只能得到他想要的大约一半的钱。当作品完成之后，那位主顾被请来看画。其实，这幅画不过是胡乱涂抹的一片鲜红。这是什么？那位买主喊了起来。我要的是红海，是那次著名的航海。这就是，霍迦斯回答说。可是以色列人在哪儿？他们都已经渡过去了。埃及人在哪儿？他们全都淹死了。
your grandfather
A well dressed young man demanded as soon as he entered the restaurant:”Serve me, quick! Give me your best. I don‘t care the price.”Not like the way he talked, the waiter said to him: “Hey Buddy, it doesn‘t matter you have a lot of money. You are still son of somebody, and grandson of somebody else.”The young man raged: “Dare you! Tell me, who wants me to be his grandson?”The waiter replied with ease: “Nobody. Just your grandfather.”
翻译:
你爷爷
一位衣冠楚楚的年青人一进饭店就大声嚷嚷：“喂，有什么好菜尽管端上来，钱多少我不在乎。”服务员听了很不是滋味：“哥儿们，钱多顶个屁，你不照样得做别人的儿子，就是有人要你做孙子你也不敢不做！”年青人勃然大怒：“谁敢占老子的便宜？你说，是谁不要命了，胆敢要老子做他的孙子？”服务员慢条斯理地答道：“你爷爷！”
