“Flowers need water,” said the teacher. “Water your flowers every day, or they‘ll die.”
One morning Mother saw Marry out in the garden and asked, “What are you doing there, Marry?”
“Watering flowers,” said Marry.
“But it is raining now!”
“Oh, it doesn‘t matter. Mum.”
翻译：
“花需要水，” 老师说，“每天给花浇水，否则他们会死掉的”。
一天早上，母亲看到玛丽在花园，就问：“玛丽，你在干吗？”
“ 我在给花浇水。”玛丽回答。
“可是在下雨啊！”
“哦，没事妈妈。”
A little boy bustled（喧闹，忙乱） into a grocery one day with a memorandum（便笺） in his hand.
″Hello, Mr. Smith,″He said, ″I want thirteen pounds of coffee at 33 cents.″
″Very good,″ said the grocer, and he noted down the sale.
″Anything else, Charlie?″
″Yes. Twenty－seven pounds of sugar at 9 cents.″
″The loaf? And whatelse?″
″Seven and a half pounds of bacon at 30 cents.″
″That will be a good brand. Goon.″
″Five pounds of tea at 90 cents, eleven and a half quarts of molasses at 8 cents a pint, two eight－pound hams at 31 cents, and five dozen jars of pickled walnuts（核桃） at 34 cents a jar.″
The grocer made out the bill.
″It‘s a big order,″ he said. ″Did your mother tell you to pay for it？″
″My mother,″ said the boy, as he pocketed the neat and accurate bill, ″has nothing to do with this business. It is my arithmetic（算术） lesson and I had to get it done somehow.″（英语笑话带翻译 www.lyy5.com）
翻译：
一天，一个小男孩匆匆忙忙地走进了一家杂货店，手里拿着一张清单。
“史密斯先生，你好，”他说道：“3毛3分钱一磅的咖啡，请给我13磅。”
“好的，”杂货店老板马上把这笔生意记了下来。
“还要别的什么，查理？”
“要的。再要27磅糖，9分钱一磅的。”
“面包要不要？还要什么？”“7磅半咸肉，3毛钱一磅的。”
“这肉是名牌的呢，还有呢？”
“9毛钱一磅的茶叶，给我5磅，8分钱一品脱的糖浆要11夸脱半，3毛1分钱一磅的8磅的大火腿要两只，3毛4分钱一罐的腌核桃要5打。”
杂货店老板把账单算了出来。“你买了很多东西，”他说：“你妈妈叫你现在把钱付清吗？”
小男孩一面把那清楚准确的账单放进口袋，一面说：“这和我妈没关系，这是我自己的算术作业,我总得想办法把它做出来！”
Father: Jack, why do you drink so much water?
Jack: I have just had an apple, Dad.
Father: What‘s that got to do with it?
Jack: I forgot to wash the apple.
翻译：
爸爸：杰克，你干嘛喝这么多水呀？
杰克：我刚才吃了个苹果，爸爸。
爸爸：可是这跟喝水有什么关系呢？
杰克：我忘了洗苹果呀。
